
Have you watched the movie ‘Yes Man’, where Jim Carrey challenges himself to say yes for an entire year? You don’t have to watch the movie to imagine the adventures, troubles and hilarious situations that ensue. Is it realistic? No. It’s probably not (it’s hilarious though). However, it’s something that we’re all dealing with from time to time. Our lives are flooded with decisions, most of them are, thankfully, ones that we can make without great consequences. But what about those that are, or seem to be, so important to your life?
Saying no is just as important as saying yes
Are you a no-sayer or a yes-sayer? Are you seizing every opportunity or do you say no when something doesn’t suit you? Society has given quite a bad name to saying ‘no’. “Why don’t you want to be involved, take those opportunities, be there, do something? Saying yes will get you somewhere, will make you successful”. That’s a lie. Saying no is just as important as saying yes. It’s all about priorities. Your priorities.
What do you want to achieve? What is most important to you? Is it to be known for working extra hours to solve that important project, is it to be a great friend? Do you want to be at every party or do you want to take care of your body and rest? Whatever it is, it’s your decision. Saying yes or saying no are not equal to good or bad. Just make sure that whatever you choose, you do it because you want to. Not because you feel like it’s what you have to do.
How to say no:
- Take some time to make your decision. Think about it. Prioritise.
- Don’t feel guilty when you say no, you only have one life with limited time.
- Be clear and honest. You have the right to say no.
- Don’t apologise, give the person a calm explanation.
- If you don’t want to completely say no, opt some alternatives. Compromise.
- Know that you can’t please everyone. You’re not a jar of Nutella.
Saying yes or saying no are not equel to good or bad: leuk dat je dat zegt, want nee zeggen geeft vaak een schuld gevoel of teleurstelling bij de vrager terwijl het voor jezelf wel een goede keuze kan zijn! Het blijft lastig!
Dat herkennen wij wel, Barbara! Zolang we ons maar bewust zijn van waarom we ‘ja’ of ‘nee’ zeggen! Dankjewel voor je reactie!
Wat een fijn stukje om te lezen. Ik weet niet waar ik het gehoord heb, maar de gedachte die mij vaak helpt bij het ja of nee zeggen, is: nee zeggen is ja zeggen tegen iets anders. En ja zeggen is dus nee zeggen tegen iets anders.
Dankjewel voor het compliment, Nina! Die gedachte sluit inderdaad mooi aan op deze blogpost! Die gaan we onthouden 😉